Ideas for Sticking to Our New Year’s Resolutions
Here we are again - late December, less than a week before Christmas. As December comes to a close, we will be leaving 2024 behind forever. It’s around this time of year that we crave fresh starts, clean slates, and the willpower to get our sh*t together. This desire to start over usually comes in the form of goal setting: need to lose weight, need to quit [insert bad habit], need to make more money, need to make more time for loved ones. However, we usually drop these goals within the first few weeks of the year. As boldly as we set our goals, we just as boldly put them down and make them next year’s problem. I would love to set and stick to a few realistic goals this year.
This may sound odd, but I think one of the reasons we ultimately stop caring about our New Year’s resolutions is because we psychologically associate them with New Year’s only. And once we settle into the new year, it may not feel like our goals are relevant anymore. Perhaps it would be wiser to call our New Year’s resolutions something more timeless, such as “life goals,” or “forever goals.”
In psychology, there is a lot to be said about black-and-white thinking, and I am a huge offender myself. In my mind, if I fail to work out as often as I would like or don’t stick to the perfect diet, I know I am not getting the full benefits of doing those things, and that becomes my excuse to give up entirely. Since healthy habits are not necessarily the most fun habits, we’ll stick to any excuse to abandon them. I believe this applies to New Year’s resolutions as well.
Here are some ideas for how we can more easily stick to our goals for 2025 (and every year therefore):
Let go of the pressure to kick off the new year with “the perfect start.” At the beginning of every year, we feel this strange pressure to completely overhaul our lives. It’s like there’s this unspoken rule that we need to set huge, life-altering goals that will make us 100% better versions of ourselves by the end of the year. But here’s the thing: that mindset is exactly what makes resolutions so difficult to stick to. Furthermore, the concept of self-optimization is both toxic and nearly impossible to accomplish. Setting an unrealistic goal—such as, “I’m going to run a marathon by February,” or “I’ll completely give up sugar forever,” can backfire quickly. When you inevitably miss a day at the gym or eat some full-fat ice cream, it feels like a failure. So, the first step in setting your New Year’s resolutions is to ditch perfectionism. Changing your habits slowly and consistently is probably a much better way to improve your life.
Set smaller goals and go into the new year with low expectations. Rather than saying you’re going to go jogging for 30 minutes every single day, aim for 5 minutes. Or 10 minutes. However much you know you can stick to, rain or shine. Likewise, instead of saying you’ll read a new book every single week, aim for one new book per month. I’ve even heard of people reading 10 pages per day. Even though these are smaller goals, you’ll build the confidence of knowing you can stick to your goals no matter what, and perhaps you can set even bigger goals in the future. And of course, there will be days when you can do more and will exceed your goal, making you feel even better about yourself.
Be really specific about your goals. Vague statements, like “I want to lose weight” probably won’t motivate you to make that happen. Something like, “I want to lose 5 lbs by Valentine’s Day, and I’m going to do it by walking 30 minutes most days of the week and reducing my caloric intake to 1,800/day” is a super realistic and clear roadmap to get you to where you want to be. Likewise, if your goals involve improving your finances, you might say something like, “I want to save 5% or 10% of my net pay” instead of, “I want to save more money.”
Break bigger goals into smaller steps. If you want to write a book, for example, that goal might seem intimidating and unachievable. But if you tell yourself that you want to write 1,000 words per week or 100 words per day, that might seem more doable to you. It may take several months or years to get that book done, but time is going to pass by anyway. There’s no need to rush huge, important goals. If you want to get a promotion at your job, you might set a small goal of completing one or two more projects per month, and/or meeting with your boss every week/month to get feedback on your progress.
Try focusing on daily habits, not just goals. A key to lasting change isn’t just focusing on the goal itself—it’s about creating habits that support the goal. Goals are results, while habits are the process that gets you there. Creating a system for yourself that allows you some flexibility while also allowing you to get where you want to be is the way to go. Every night after I put my daughter to sleep, I usually head over to the living room and kitchen and clean up any messes that I haven’t cleaned up yet. I always make sure dishes are in the dishwasher and the sink is completely clean. Doing these things for so many years has made it so that it doesn’t feel like a chore anymore - it’s almost instinctual. After you repeat habits enough times, it becomes second nature over time.
Be flexible and forgiving with yourself. Don’t let perfection be the enemy of the good. There’s never going to be a goal that you can stick to every single day without fail. You will inevitably have something come up that forces you to put your goals and healthy habits on the back burner. But luckily, these are just temporary setbacks and they don’t define us. Remind yourself consistently that perfection is not achievable and is only going to set you back if that’s what you’re aiming for. Easier said than done, I know. This is something I struggle with all the time. Perhaps letting go of rigidity should be one of my New Year’s goals.
Celebrate all of your wins. Whether it’s writing another 10 pages in your book or losing 5 lbs, those are steps toward who you want to be. Only celebrating when you achieve huge milestones does nothing good for your motivation. Be sure to celebrate in a way that doesn’t undermine your goals, of course.
New Year, same you (but slightly improved). Remember that the road to personal growth is not linear and there will always be joyful moments along the journey, not just when you get to the destination.
Happy New Year!
XOXO, Alexis.